Who will be my valentine?

Experiencing nervousness or loneliness around February 14th and especially on the day itself is something that many of us can relate to. Even if you have already met the love of your life, it is easy to have too high expectations and ending up with a sour aftertaste in your mouth at the end of the day. Maybe you were not as happy and in love like everybody else seemed to be, or your sweetheart did not surprise you with a bouquet of roses and a trip to Paris. But try not to forget what this day is really all about! 

Valentines day seems to have become a major consumer holiday when it is really about celebrating love. All together americans spend more than twenty billion dollars on this holiday, every year. Social media is full of photos of jewelry, expensive chocolate and grand gestures, but don't let this bring you down! You can be your own valentine and spend the day taking care of yourself. Or spend it with someone you love, no matter if that means platonic love. Do something that makes you happy and something that contributes to making that day more special.

For you:

Put on some music and dance. Paint your nails red, write down your honest thoughts, read your favorite book and reflect on why you love that book so much, and maybe take a bath? And most importantly try not to suppress your feelings. Maybe they are exactly what you need to feel and what you need to work through right now. Maybe you need this to figure yourself out. Take a break from social media and focus on yourself for a while. If you want, you can look at it like this: Valentines day is a day where you can take a break and focus on your own well being. It is a day where you can concentrate your energy on finding out how to love yourself and learning to fall in love with yourself. Fall in love with life. Let your thoughts wander and listen to your heart, truly and deeply. What is it that you want out of life?

Come together:

Who said platonic love is any less worthy than romantic love? 

Gather your friends, family or pets, come together and celebrate. Cook some dinner for them, watch a feel-good movie and listen to some music. If you are spending the day with a group of friends you can all write what you are grateful for about each other on post its and make a game out of it. Focus on all the love that is filling the world and how it is defining us. No small talk, only words that matters to you. Talk about the things that keeps you awake at night and all the things that can make you light up. Discuss memories and hopes for the future. Make it a day where love is the center of attention. 

With your sweetheart:

Many people put too much pressure on this day. Maybe it is easier if you plan the day together so that neither of you will end up disappointed? Do something that you want to do, not what is expected as the 'perfect' valentine date. Making the day less materialistic is something that can improve the quality of it as well. Go to a museum that you have been talking about for ages but never visited or go see a musical. Focus on doing things that boosts you creativity or something that reminds you of why you chose each other. Make personalized gifts for each other, such as creating a map of all your favorite places so you can explore the city together or make a collection of old photos and a sentimental token from your first date. Write valentines cards filled with heartfelt words and seal the envelope with a kiss.

Spread love:

You can also spend the day focusing on spreading love. Sometimes the best way to deal with sadness or melancholy is by doing something nice for others. Feeling appreciated for being exactly where you are in a certain moment is an incredible and powerful feeling. Do some charity work, donate some money, help a friend out or compliment people wholeheartedly. Write a poem for your friend, donate clothes or tell your parents you love them. Every little thing you do matters and makes a difference. I believe that acting with kindness will heal your heart, mind and soul.

-Martine xx